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How Does Funeral Pre-Planning Help Ease Grief? November 24, 2021

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There is no magic formula to ease grief. Death is emotional and stressful, no matter the circumstance. 

But knowing that a loved one’s plans are honored can help minimize the stress and ease the grief that family and friends feel when a loved one dies. Often, the stress that happens after a loved one’s death arises because family and friends are uncertain of what the deceased would have wanted: a funeral or a celebration of life? Should there be a religious ceremony or something less devout? Which songs would they like to have played, which Bible passages read?

Then there’s the question of finances. It’s an uncomfortable situation, but a very real one. Funerals cost money. Not knowing if you can afford a funeral is stressful, and that’s a stress that’s made even worse because of the grief that accompanies death. 

Pre-planning a loved one’s funeral can be a way to ease grief and alleviate some of the stress that occurs when a loved one dies.


How to Ease Grief by Pre-Planning the Funeral

Because everyone experiences grief differently, it is impossible to say that any one thing will ease grief for everyone. Our practice has always been to honor each person and each family. We do that through funeral planning; we help ensure that religious customs are observed, for instance, or that expressed wishes are honored. 

We also do that by encouraging families to pre-plan as much of their funeral as possible. This looks different for different people.



The Funeral Pre-Planning Checklist

For some people, pre-planning a funeral means having a private conversation with their loved one when that loved one is still lucid and able to communicate. They might ask what their loved one wants for a funeral. They might ask if they want a certain flower or a certain song. They might talk about what kind of casket or urn they’d want, or where they’d like to be buried. Some families pre-purchase plots at the cemetery to make sure they can be buried together when the time comes.

For others, pre-planning a funeral also includes saving enough money to cover expenses. We go a step further and offer pre-planning services that will alleviate even that stress for your family. 

Here are some of the important things to think about when you’re pre-planning funeral arrangements with a loved one:

What type of service do they want? Do they want it to be small and intimate, or large and inclusive? Do they want it at a church or other place of worship? Or would they prefer everyone meet at a park? Do they want certain flowers, readings, or songs? Are there specific people they want to serve as pallbearers? Do they want family members or close friends to read, sing, or offer a few words? 

If they want a funeral and a burial, it’s important to talk about whether they want to have an open or closed casket at the services. If they want to be cremated, do they want their ashes to be kept by a loved one or would they rather their ashes be spread in nature or buried?

These might seem like difficult things to discuss; but knowing what your loved one wants can actually help ease the grief you feel when they pass because you will know that you carried out their wishes. 

Who to Trust When Pre-Planning a Funeral 

When you pre-plan your funeral with us, you know exactly how much the services will cost–and because it’s pre-paid, it doesn’t matter if costs increase between now and the time of services. This is because if you pre-pay your funeral expenses through us, we place those funds in a protected account that earns interest. You’ll never need to worry that you won’t be able to have the funeral you want, because you’ll have already taken care of it.

This is a generous gift to your loved ones. Not only will they never need to worry about paying for your service, but all the stress over planning a funeral that will honor and commemorate you in the way they want to will be taken care of for them. This takes the burden off their shoulders and allows them time and space to grieve. 

While we always want to earn your business, we understand that you might want to shop around. It’s vital that you feel comfortable with any funeral home and funeral director that you choose. A good funeral director understands that asking questions and discussing these matters can be emotional and fraught, and they make room to honor your emotional state while looking out for your best interests. The best funeral home directors are direct but compassionate, and will broach delicate topics with honesty and kindness. That’s the kind of service we’ve always strived to give. 

Prearranged Funeral Plans are Flexible

We all have different circumstances. Some people want to pre-plan and have the means to do so. Others want to, but maybe don’t have the financial capability to do all they want to do. We work with families that fall into all categories. We encourage you to pre-pay for funeral arrangements, but we don’t require it. We’re happy to help you pre-plan even if you cannot afford to pre-pay. 

We are always happy to discuss options that are available to you to pre-plan a funeral. Learn more here or reach out anytime.